chez_jae

Last Wolf Standing by Rhyannon Byrd

My rating: 2 of 5 stars



Yesterday, I finished reading the book I'd taken to the office. It was a Silhouette Nocturne, called Last Wolf Standing, by Rhyannon Byrd. It's the first in the "Bloodrunners" series within the line. The main characters are Mason Dillinger, a half-werewolf, and Torrance Watson, a human woman.

As a member of the Bloodrunners, it's Mason's job to hunt down and eliminate rogue werewolves. He has no time for love, but when a chance encounter with Torrance rocks his world, Mason finds himself unable to just let her leave. Unfortunately, the rogue he's tracking notices his regard for the human woman, making Torrance a target. Now Mason feels compelled to take Torrance under his wing to protect her, all while maintaining the focus he needs for the hunt.

Torrance has always had an irrational fear of monsters, and when she learns they're real, her entire world view shifts. She is both frightened by and drawn to Mason even as he attempts to keep her at arm's length. Will Torrance be able to break through the icy walls around her wolf's heart?

Incidentally, my "blurb" above is nothing like the blurb on the back of the book. Did the creator of the book blurb actually read the book? Le sigh.

Okay. If I were to sum up this story in one line, it would be A horrifying homage to misogyny, Stockholm Syndrome, and blithering idiocy.

To begin with, when Mason first saw Torrance, it was in a coffee shop. He hadn't ordered yet, and she was about to leave with her order. Heaven forbid she just walk out of his life (never mind the fact that she'd only been in it for a moment); therefore, he tripped her. He tripped her. Silly me, I didn't realize that our male lead was an 8 year-old boy. I guess this is what passed for a 'meet-cute' in 2008. Honestly, I would have thought this book was written in the 1980's, considering how domineering he was and how quailing she was. I wish I could go back in time and kick my own ass for reading (worse, enjoying) such books when I was a teen. Moving on. After this physical abuse (don't you dare call it anything else), Mason is coming across as too intense, and Torrance smartly dips out.

Skip ahead to where the rogue breaks into Torrance's apartment, physically abuses her, sexually abuses her, and threatens to rape and murder her. Cue Mason and his partner arriving on the scene to chase off the interloper, whereupon our blithering idiot of a female lead wilts into Mason's arms. She now knows he's a monster (you know, the thing she has a pathological fear of?), she's just been assaulted by another monster, yet she feels safe and protected in his arms? Really? I think most people would have been in the midst of a screaming panic attack by then. Torrance dips out once more, but of course Mason tracks her down again (stalkerish much?), which is when he convinces not only her but her BFF that he and only he can protect Torrance, but she has to go with him. Wow. With friends like Michaela, Torrance didn't need any enemies, did she? "Yeah, sure, go off with that hunka-hunka gorgeous man who's brought shocking violence into your life. What's the worst that could happen?"

They finally reach Mason's cabin (after more drama and violence), which is when Mason insists that he can't protect Torrance unless she shares his bed. And...she fell for that. I just cannot with how spineless and stupid this woman was. Sexual activity ensued, although no actual intercourse, after which our blithering idiot realized that she was falling for Mason. After two days. Because she was drawn to him. Since he was so attractive. What if he'd been homely? Moving on.

Mason, of course, knows that Torrance is his mate, but he has no intention of falling in love with her, because, ew. More like, 'I cannot love someone, for it will make me weak.' Good ol' Mason channels his inner Meatloaf and tells her, "I want you, I need you, but there ain't no way I'm ever gonna love you." At least he was honest with her. Torrance finally starts to develop a tiny spine and declares that she can't settle for a man who won't love her, which angers Mason, because why must she make things so complicated? No joke, "complicated" is the word he used. Often.

Let's not forget the 'spring a meeting with my parents on my mate surprise' that Mason subjected Torrance to. Why she had not yet run screaming into the wilderness is beyond me. Finally, there was the finale. I called it about one-third of the way through the book. 'Bad guy will kidnap the female lead, and the hero will have to come save her in some overwrought fight to the death, after which he will FINALLY declare his undying love for her.' While writing this, the author must have channeled her inner Kathleeen E Woodiwiss. I loved her books! When I was young and dumb. I should have read this one when I was young and dumb; I might have enjoyed it then. I was so relieved when this was over. I stuck with it, because I ain't no quitter. That, and it was the only thing I had at work to read on my lunch breaks.

Favorite lines:
♦ "What happened? You look like you just came from an orgy with one of the undead."
Doesn't orgy imply there must have been more than one?
♦ Then she looked their way, and a sharp cry fell from her lips as she started running toward them. Mason opened his arms, ready to catch her, when she sailed right past him, falling to her knees beside a grinning Jeremy. "Ohmygod," she gasped, her small hands fluttering in front of her as if she didn't know where to touch him without hurting him. "Are you okay?"
Hah! BEST damned line of the book, if you ask me.
♦ "Fear is sometimes healthy, and sometimes it's just an excuse to keep us back from the things we want most in life."

You know what the worst part about this book was? Torrance apologized to Mason for the fact that she hurt his feelers when she said she wanted a life partner who could love her. It was like, 'Oh, ha ha, what was I thinking? It was naive of me to have this ideal in mind. I should just love you the way you are, even if you can never return my feelings, thus leaving me to spend my entire fucking life heartbroken and unfulfilled so you can cling to your own ideal of being a tough he-man who don't need no love.' I need some brain bleach after reading this.

I'm giving the book two stars. It gets more than one because the writing itself was good, even though the content was beyond awful. If you like your male leads to be domineering, cold-hearted bullies and your female leads to be simpering little airheads, give it a read!

Guardian's Keep by Lori Devoti

My rating: 2 of 5 stars



I finished reading Guardian's Keep at lunch today. It's a paranormal romance by author Lori Devoti. The two main characters were witch Kelly Shane and shape-shifter (called a garm) Kol Hildr.

Kol's job is to guard the portal that is located in his bar, Guardian's Keep. It's a position he's held for a century, and nothing and no one will take it from him, not even a beautiful, feisty witch. Kelly has been approached by a female garm who has asked her to travel through the portal at Guardian's Keep to rescue her kidnapped son. Something about Aesa seems off to Kelly, but the thought of a child in danger tugs at her heartstrings. She's willing to do anything she can to save him, even if she has to go through Kol to do so.

Having two opposing goals was not the most auspicious start for a relationship. Indeed, Kelly and Kol spent about half the book in a battle of wills...which lasted until they had sex. Because sex solves everything. Blah. I did not enjoy this story, and I swear my IQ dropped ten points just from reading it.

( Spoiler alert )

Favorite lines:
♣ Why did she have to do something as stupid as have sex with the enemy?
Because you're stupid, Kelly!
♣ "Thought you might be in a bit of a pickle."

I could literally feel my lip curl while reading this book. Would certainly not recommend it unless you're a fan of bullying men and insipid women. It redeemed itself marginally at the end, thus earning two stars instead of one.

EDITING to add the first line of someone else's review:
I kept hoping Kelly would get hit by a bus.
Ha ha! Yes! Thank you!

Master of the Moon by Angela Knight

My rating: 2 of 5 stars



During lunch today, I finished the book I'd taken to work. It was Master of the Moon, which is the second book in Angela Knight's "Mageverse" series of paranormal romances. Main characters are police officer Diana London, a werewolf known as Direkind, and Llyr Galatyn, King of the Cachamwri Sidhe.

No one in Diana's small town knows she's a werewolf except for the police chief, a staunch ally. When a vampire comes to town and begins murdering young men, Diana is determined to bring her down. She doesn't need the added aggravation of her Burning Moon, nor the distraction of Llyr Galatyn.

Llyr is tired of repeated assassination attempts from his brother, king of the Morven Sidhe. In a bid to force Ansgar's hand, Llyr travels to the mortal realm to deal with one of the many vampires that are now creating havoc. There, he encounters Diana, and the attraction between them is instantaneous. However, there is still the matter of the vampire to take care of, not to mention Ansgar, and all while keeping mortals blissfully unaware of the magic in their midst.

The story was tough and gritty and would have made a decent urban fantasy if the author had kept the budding romance on the back burner. Instead, it ended up being erotic romance with some plot thrown in as framework. I feel like I should iron my own hands for saying there was too much sex, but...yeah. There was too much sex. Each time I'd get invested in the plot, Diana and Llyr would take a nookie break. Maddening. Beyond that, characterizations were only okay. Diana was fully-realized, Llyr less so. Ansgar was at best a two-dimensional villain with no redeeming qualities and no real reason for doing what he did except that he was a two-dimenionsal villain. The vampire had more character than he did and more back story. The plot, what there was of it, could have been more cohesive. It seemed to ping-pong from a murder/investigation to a sexual encounter, lather, rinse, repeat.

Other things that annoyed me:( Spoilers and trigger warning )

Favorite line: Diana didn't trust herself to keep a choke chain on her libido with the King of the Sidhe flexing under her nose. All she needed was to lose control, rip the enchanted Armani off his luscious body, and bang his fairy brains out in front of God and the Verdaville City Council.

Did I find this book entertaining? No, I found it distasteful. I know I have at least one more book in the "Mageverse" series, and I'm tossing it in the donation bag along with this one. I refuse to subject myself to any more of what the author considers romance. The book was well-written (for the most part), but it gets only two stars from me.

A Quick Bite by Lynsay Sands

My rating: 2 of 5 stars



I brought my book from the office home to finish, and I just now completed it. The book was A Quick Bite by Lynsay Sands, and it's the first in her "Argeneau" series of vampire chick-lit. The main characters are Lissiana Argeneau, a 200-year old vampire, and Dr Greg Hewitt, a psychologist specializing in treating phobias.

Lissiana has an unusual phobia for a vampire: she faints at the sight of blood. However, her mother, Marguerite, has the solution. She kidnaps Dr Hewitt to have him treat Lissiana. When her mother mentions a special birthday gift for her and Lissiana finds Greg tied to her bed, she believes her mother has provided him for a treat. It's not until after Lissiana bites Greg and engages in some heavy kissing and frotting that she learns he was meant to cure her phobia. Lissiana feels terrible about the way Greg was treated, and she helps him escape from the family home. Fearful now that the vampire council may wish to exterminate Greg since he knows that vampires exist, Lissiana and Greg go on the run, leading them into more danger.

For the most part, this was fun and sexy and cute, with an added dollop or two of drama and danger, but I couldn't help finding the entire scenario absurd and annoying.
( Spoilers!! )

Favorite line: It was hard to be scared of people you've seen in their pajamas.

Overall, a disappointing read from this author. Two stars.

Yellow as Legal Pads by Fran Stewart

My rating: 1 of 5 stars



During my lunch break today I completed the book Yellow as Legal Pads by Fran Stewart. It's the second book in the "Biscuit McKee" mystery series, although it's the first one I've read. It will also be the last.

Martinsville librarian Bisque "Biscuit" McKee is enjoying her honeymoon when the celebration is abruptly cut short by murder. A man has been poisoned, and when Biscuit's new husband, Bob, tries to help the victim, he absorbs a dangerous amount of the toxin, as well. Now, instead of celebrating her recent nuptials, Biscuit is left to keep vigil in the hospital.

If you remember Blaine and Antoine from In Living Color, I hope you can hear their voices saying, "Hated it!", because that's how I feel about this book. How do I hate thee, book? Let me count the ways:

1. A grown-ass woman going by the name 'Biscuit' because her idiot, potter mother named her and her sister Bisque and Glaze. Frankly, when I picked up this book, I thought Biscuit was the cat. Silly me. I don't know why I would have presumed the ginger cat, featured prominently on the cover, might be the titular character of "Biscuit".
2. This may have been classified as a mystery, but Biscuit did not do any sleuthing, investigating, nor questioning. She simply kept vigil in the hospital, which is a realistic reaction to your new husband almost being murdered, but was not entertaining for the reader.
3. TOO MANY POINTS OF VIEW! Biscuit was in first person pov, but every other pov was third.
4. Not only did the book 'open at the close', but it skipped around, time-wise.
5. A huge chunk of the story had nothing to do with Biscuit nor the murder, but rather took the reader back in time to set up why the murder took place.
6. The narrative was utterly disjointed and confusing.
7. If Bob was an unfortunate victim, why then did the murderer try to kill Biscuit towards the end? She was distraught. She wasn't busily piecing together clues and coming closer and closer to figuring out who done what and why.
8. The cat, whose name was "Marmalade", by the way, had nothing to do with the investigation either. She was sentient and had her own names for the main characters in her life (which was another whole level of confusing, but let's not go there), and she seemed to be able to pick up on Biscuit's thoughts and emotions even though they were separated by distance.

Favorite line: Shuffling things around, she piled a couple of pairs of rubber gloves on top of the popcorn box, shifted the canola oil over to the side of the cabinet, wondering as she did so what the hell a canola was.

In short, this book was a hot, confusing mess. Did not like; would not recommend. Too bad for me that I bought two books in this series. I "Hated it!" so much that both of them are going in the donation bag. I regret wasting my time reading this one, and I refuse to waste any more of my precious time reading the other one.

One star, reluctantly given, but it's the lowest I can go.

The Art of Seducing a Naked Werewolf by Molly Harper

My rating: 5 of 5 stars



At work today I finished reading The Art of Seducing a Naked Werewolf by Molly Harper. It's the second book in her "Naked Werewolf" series. This time, the main character is Maggie Graham, pack alpha for a group of werewolves living in a secluded valley in Alaska.

After assuming the mantle of pack alpha, Maggie is learning the job is mostly tedious and boring. That is, until a human researcher arrives in Grundy, intent on learning if the rumors of lycanthropes in the area are true. Maggie needs to discourage him from prying and encourage him to leave, but Nick Thatcher is persistent. Too bad he's also handsome and brainy, and Maggie finds it difficult to stay away from him. She has bigger problems on her plate than one nosy researcher. A rival pack of werewolves has been encroaching on pack territory, and there may be a battle ahead. Worse, two of the males in her pack have been sniffing around, and Maggie isn't sure she wants to mate with either of them, especially when she continues to be distracted by Nick...

This was nothing but lighthearted fun. There were some tense moments, but it seemed any danger or drama was dealt with rather swiftly. That was fine; I don't need to spend the entirety of a book on tenterhooks. Maggie would rather gnaw off her paw than admit she's attracted to Nick, which led to some amusing moments. I enjoyed the fact that characters from the first book in the series played prominent roles. If I found anything dismaying, it was how everyone in Maggie's pack seemed to be throwing her at Nick or Nick at her...yet as a whole, werewolves frown on mating with humans. It made for some 'WTF?' moments.

Favorite lines;
♦ The best thing about being a werewolf was that you never needed a sports bra.
♦ "Baby showers should be reserved as punishment for betrayers in the Seventh Circle of Hell."
♦ "How many family conversations are going to be interrupted by me telling you, no, you can't kill someone and make it look like an accident?"
♦ Every village needed an idiot.
♦ She had a knack for relieving the tension in a room by pretending my rudeness away with cooking. Many, many chickens had given up their lives to cover my conversational shortcomings.
♦ Nothing about Mo screamed predatory or even vaguely threatening unless you cut her off from chocolate.
♦ "I guess he knew the way to that teeny-tiny Grinch heart of yours is through your stomach."
♦ I wondered where to put my hands. Well, I knew where I wanted to put them, but I think that would probably be a felony if I did it without warning him first.
♦ "What do you think of the Red Wings' chances this season?" // "They'll be fine until the Avalanche take the ice."
♦ "If I see a rabbit dressed in camo trying to jimmy the screen door with a hunting knife, I'll call for help."
♦ This was the saddest pie of all. // "He's moved on to meringue," said Mo, shaking her head. "This does not bode well." // "I'll talk to him," I promised her. // "You should. He asked this morning if I could get enough peaches to make a cobbler." // "No one says they're sorry with cobbler." // "Yeah, 'cause saying it with pie is super-normal."
♦ "When has telling someone to do what makes them happy ever resulted in a good decision? Remember when we told cousin Todd to do what made him happy and he came home with recently augmented boobs?"
♦ "Never piss off a porcupine, no matter how jolly he may seem."
♦ His face lit up as if I'd just offered him the Holy Grail, a Babe Ruth rookie card, and Megan Fox's phone number.
♦ "What if I throw an extra-large bag of Twizzlers into the deal?" // "No, no, no," I told him. "Twizzlers are fifth-or-sixth-date material. You have to start out slowly, with Goobers or Sour Patch Kids."
♦ Nick had disappeared like Wet Wipes on a porn set.
♦ I thought I was going to have to start fanning my face to keep from bursting into flames. Curse his sexy brains!
♦ "Nick won't tell me whether he has sisters. I figure, he's pretty, he would have to have pretty sisters."

Fun, funny, and I laughed out loud several times while reading it. Five stars!

Kilt Dead by Kaitlyn Dunnett

My rating: 3 of 5 stars



Finished my "work" book at lunch today. It was Kilt Dead by Kaitlyn Dunnett, and it's the first book in the "Liss MacCrimmon" cozy mystery series. The main character is Liss MacCrimmon, who's recently been forced to give up her career as a professional Scottish dancer. Story is in third-person pov, and it was told from the perspective of several characters, although Liss was the most prevalent.

While recuperating from career-ending knee surgery, Liss agrees to return to her small hometown of Moosetookalook, Maine, to take over her Aunt Margaret's shop, the Scottish Emporium, while Margaret is out of town. The day after Margaret departs, Liss finds herself manning the shop's booth at the Highland Games festival. When she returns to the shop that evening, she stumbles upon the body of Margaret's nosy neighbor, Mrs Norris. As if that weren't distressing enough, the hotshot detective called in to work the case immediately zeroes in on Liss as the primary suspect in the woman's murder. Not content to sit idly by, Liss begins asking some questions on her own. She's helped by former friends/classmates Dan and Sherri. When Liss' investigation hits too close to home, her own life ends up in danger. Will she be able to solve the mystery before she becomes another victim?

*yawns*

I am very "meh" about this story. The characters did not resonate with me, although that may be because so much of what I read these days is in first-person pov. The premise was okay, but I felt the execution of it fell flat. Aside from that, the following things did not set well with me:

1. Within 20 minutes of arriving at the scene, the lead detective is grilling Liss. Mrs Norris died when she fell and hit her head, but the detective, without a medical examination, is already declaring that she could not possibly have fallen and hit her head that hard; ergo, she was pushed. Excuse me? People fall, strike their heads, and die every day. It happens. Not only that, but wouldn't the body still be limp and warm if Liss had just killed her? Maybe we need to pin down time of death before we start throwing around accusations.
2. Detective Jackass came across as too lazy to bother looking into the situation further, arrogantly convinced that he was correct in his initial assumptions.
3. Um, did Liss and Dan sleep together? The author was very vague with their "pleasant interlude", leaving me to wonder if it was just a hot and heavy make-out session, or did they actually bump fuzzies?
4. Once again, I found the sheer number of povs to be distracting and detracting.
5. I'm sorry, but as a Harry Potter fan, I could not read about "Mrs Norris" without picturing Filch's mangy old cat. Guh.

On a bright note, Liss did NOT swoon over Detective Jackass. In fact, she thought he was a jackass. Good for you, Liss! Also, good for me, figuring out that Mrs Norris was writing fanfic in her spare time. Hah!

Favorite lines:
♦ "Remember when she had five felines in residence, along with a dog she named Not-a-cat?"
♦ "I can't even predict what I'll do half the time."

The story had its good points, but the rest of it was far too aggravating for enjoyment. I do not plan on reading any more books in this series. Giving it an average score, and I think that's being generous.

Snow Way Out by Christine Husom

My rating: 3 of 5 stars



At lunch today, I finished the book I'd taken to the office. It was Snow Way Out, which is the first book in the "Snow Globe Shop" mystery series by Christine Husom. Main character is Camryn "Cami" Brooks, who has taken over her parents' curio shop that sells snow globes.

Cami and her friend, Pinky, own and operate a curio shop and a coffee shop that are connected by an open, arched doorway. The two of them decide to host a class one evening to teach participants how to make snow globes. Afterward, Cami finds a snow globe in her shop she swears she's never seen before. It depicts a man sleeping on a park bench. While walking home that evening, she comes across an eerily similar scene in the park, only the man on the bench is dead. She admits to Assistant Chief Clinton Lonsbury that she'd seen a globe like that in her shop. Now Cami finds herself under suspicion, along with both of her BFFs--Pinky and Erin. Pinky, because she's missing a knife from her shop, and Erin, because she has a bad history with the murder victim. Cami begins trying to piece clues together on her own, in hopes of finding the real killer before someone else ends up dead.

The story was entertaining but rather ordinary. Characters were likable enough, and the plot moved along in a sensible fashion, but nothing about it really gripped me. I liked the unusual setting of a curio shop, but the fact that the romantic interest ended up being a police officer was a yawner. Overdone! I also didn't like that Clint asked Cami to go with him when he drove to another town to question the parents of a suspect who'd gone missing. Once again, no cop is going to invite a civilian on an investigation. Ever. The author threw some clever twists in to keep things mildly interesting.

Favorite line: I asked myself for the one-thousandth time how I had ever gotten into such a pickle...

Three or four stars? Let's put it to the
( Trope Test )

Wow, that's about as even as you can get. Hmm...I'm going to give this an average score of three.

Reining in Murder by Leigh Hearon

My rating: 3 of 5 stars



I brought my "work" book home this weekend to finish it. The book was Reining in Murder by Leigh Hearon, and it's the first in the "Carson Stables" mystery series. Story is in third person point of view from the perspective of the main character, Annie Carson.

Annie owns and trains horses, and she also works with a horse rescue group. For that reason, she's called out of bed on a blustery night to take charge of a horse from the scene of an accident. A man was delivering the horse to one of Annie's neighbors, wealthy Hilda Colbert, when he lost control and was killed. Later, when Annie attempts to deliver the horse to its rightful owner, she finds Hilda's dead body. Now there are two deaths associated with this horse, and Annie can't help but be curious. She also can't help but be annoyed when her flighty half-sister, Lavender, pays her a surprise visit. The two of them have nothing in common, and having Lavender underfoot simply aggravates Annie. Hilda's estranged husband, Marcus, becomes a person of interest in Hilda's murder, but after meeting him, Annie's gut tells her he's no killer. When the sheriff refuses to listen to her, Annie finds herself trying to suss out hints and clues as to who the real murderer is. Once Marcus disappears, the sheriff thinks it means he's guilty, while Annie hopes it doesn't mean he's as dead as his wife. Will she be able to solve this case before she ends up the next victim?

Hm. I enjoyed the aspect of Annie being a down to earth horsewoman, and I really enjoyed all the narrative that included the horses, both the good and the bad. Adding Lavender to the mix seems like something completely unnecessary to the story. Lavender had nothing of any worth to contribute; the subplot was a waste of time, in my opinion. I also didn't like that stoic, practical Annie fell so hard and fast for Marcus. Good grief, woman. Get yourself a battery-operated toy instead of mooning about over a man who is at best newly widowed and at worst, a cold-blooded killer. My respect for Annie as a character fell several points because of this. As for the story, it was okay. It didn't focus on Annie's sleuthing, which I appreciated. I did like how people opened up to her more than they would to the police, and that she had a knack for thinking of people to question that the police didn't. The ending seemed somewhat rushed and abrupt, and I wasn't surprised by the identity of the killer.

Favorite line: At the moment, she was following Trotter around like a moonstruck teenager, yet another equine with flawless breeding who had fallen head-over-hooves in love with a donkey.

I don't believe I'll seek out any others in this series. It was an okay read, but why waste my time reading just okay? Three stars.

Gunpowder Green by Laura Childs

My rating: 3 of 5 stars



I had very little of my work book yet to read, so I brought it home with me and finished it this evening. I read Gunpowder Green, which is the second book in Laura Childs' "Tea Shop" mystery series, featuring tea shop owner Theodosia Browning.

Theodosia joins members of Charleston's society at the annual yacht race. As the yachts make their final push to the finish, the antique pistol that was meant to signal the end of the race misfires and kills Oliver Dixon. Theo is one of the first people to reach him, but it is too late for Dixon. The sad event is chalked up to a bizarre accident, but Theodosia can't help but think it was murder. There were plenty of people who stood to gain from Oliver's death, including his new bride, Doe. As the police start to take a closer look, they hone in on Ford Cantrell, with whom Oliver had quarreled the day of the race. When Ford's sister begs Theodosia to clear her brother's name, Theo starts looking into the matter in earnest. With the help of her friends, Theo aims to flush out a killer before anyone else is harmed.

I bought a bunch of these books at a second-hand store, and now I'm sort of regretting it. They're okay for the most part, but not my favorite cup of tea. Heh. The characters are portrayed well, and the mystery was nifty, but the resolution was almost more appropriate for an episode of Scooby Doo. Once again, the author drove me batty by calling a character by first-name last-name far too often. In this case, it was Lizbeth Cantrell this and Lizbeth Cantrell that. Introduce her as Lizbeth Cantrell, then refer to her simply as Lizbeth. Guh.

Favorite line: Because not one of those good old boys was smart enough to find his backside in the hall of mirrors at high noon.

Average read, average score