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Feb 17

Mrs. Morris and the Venomous Valentine by Traci Wilton

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


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Since I don’t have to work today, I stayed up late to finish reading Mrs Morris and the Venomous Valentine by Traci Wilton. It’s the 9th installment in the “Salem B&B” series of cozy paranormal mysteries. The main character is widowed B&B owner, Charlene Morris.

In the days leading up to Valentine’s Day, Charlene has a full house. An entire entourage of fashion models, along with their over-the-top photographer are booked at the B&B. Photographer Dane Stallone had made a name for himself with his famous Cupid photos, but he’s lost his mojo. This is a last-ditch attempt to catapult himself back into the limelight. Things aren’t going well until Charlene draws on her marketing background to help Dane brainstorm some ideas. The results are amazing, and the entire crew go out on Valentine’s night to celebrate. When they return to the B&B, however, disaster strikes. Dane dies of poisoning, and someone has corrupted his laptop and stolen his work. When the photos begin dropping, along with ominous messages, the models confess to Charlene that they had each signed a blood contract with Dane. Their predicament compels Charlene to seek the advice of local witches. The witches may be able to clear the negative energy, but there’s still a murder to solve.

The story started out slowly, subjecting the reader to the models’ dramatic diva antics and Dane’s worse heavy-handed narcissism. Once he was dead is when things picked up. Charlene wasn’t being a nosy busybody (Hooray!), but when she learned anything she either let the lead detective know or encouraged someone to ‘fess up. Her relationship with Sam is heating up, and Jack made an effort not to be a jackass, which I appreciated. Characters were portrayed well, although with a dozen different models it was at times difficult to keep track of them. While I appreciated the models’ diversity, it almost seemed as if the author(s) tried too hard, you know? There was one awful editing error when model Kai’s photo dropped at 4pm...and again at 5pm. I caught that; why didn’t the editor?

Favorite lines:
♦ “We all know that fat equals flavor!”
♦ “If I had to wish anything, it would be that human beings could learn to be nice to each other and treat each other with respect.”
♦ “You don’t need everyone to like you.”
♦ “I’m getting older and don’t have the same capacity for bullshit as I used to.”
♦ “Nothing says true love like salted caramel.”

Good book for the most part, and ideal for the season. Four stars.

The Last One by Alexandra Oliva

My rating: 5 of 5 stars


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For Christmas, my boss gave me one of those “mystery books” that come wrapped in brown paper so you have no idea what you’re getting. I’ve always thought it was a fun idea, but I never bought one for myself for fear I’d buy a book I already have. When I finally opened the book from my boss, I was hoping for a mystery. What I got was a dystopian novel based on a reality survival show. I confess, I have no interest in dystopian books, movies, etc, and I detest “reality” TV. Nevertheless, the book was a gift, and I took it to work intending to read it on my lunch breaks. The book was The Last One by Alexandra Oliva.

Twelve contestants are chosen for a new, survival-based reality show, which will include group challenges and solo challenges. There’s no voting anyone off; instead contestants are provided with a Latin phrase that they can use if they give up and tap out. The show’s creators assign nicknames to each participant, such as Tracker, Rancher, and Biology. The story focuses mainly on one of the few female contestants, who is known as Zoo for her work with wildlife. For Zoo, this was meant to be one last, grand adventure before getting serious about having children with her husband. She’s tough, resourceful, and resilient, but she harbors little hope of actually winning the contest. As hunger and exhaustion begin to blur the lines between reality and what are carefully staged props, Zoo and the others are unaware that a catastrophic pandemic has swept the globe. Zoo soldiers on, convinced that the emptied buildings and “staged” bodies she encounters are part of the elaborate game she’s playing.

I had low expectations when I began reading this. I intended to soldier through like Zoo, I guess. Instead, I found the story to be utterly engrossing to the point that it annoyed me to have to close it and go back to work. LOL! As a reader, there were times I wasn’t sure what was real and what wasn’t, either. As it became apparent that Zoo was deluding herself, the story took a darker tone, because you knew the other shoe was going to drop eventually. Characters were portrayed very well, from Zoo to the other contestants, to the smarmy “host” of the show. The narrative skipped around, time-wise, which is never a favorite trope of mine. It alternated with Zoo’s first-person pov in present time, then went back in time to showcase a particular group challenge, which was all in third-person. Interspersed throughout where various social media threads by fans of the show discussing it online. I’m not fond of vacillating timelines and points of view, but it worked for this book.

Favorite lines:
♦ It’s exactly the same except now I can’t see and I’m missing a shoe.
♦ The journey’s too hard only if I’m too soft.

Not an enjoyable read by any stretch, but it was compelling and thought-provoking. Five stars.

Hooked on Ewe by Hannah Reed

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


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After cleaning house today, I sat down and finished my spare book, Hooked on Ewe by Hannah Reed. It’s the second in her “Scottish Highlands” mystery series. The main character is Eden Elliott, an American author who’s moved to Scotland for inspiration.

Eden is putting the finishing touches on her book and wibbling about sending it to a publisher. In the meantime, there’s the local sheepdog competition to raise money for the hospice to keep her occupied. Eden has nominally been assisting with the volunteer committee, but she isn’t fond of the woman who runs it with an iron fist. When Isla is found dead at the end of the competition, the constable appoints Eden as a special constable so she can assist with the investigation. Soon Eden is putting her keen mind to sifting through clues and questioning those who may have information about Isla’s whereabouts before she was murdered. The trick will be getting the notoriously close-mouthed locals to share what they know.

A fun book. I wasn’t lost for starting with the second in the series. Characters were three-dimensional. I did find Eden to be impulsive at times. I definitely thought there were some things she should have shared with the Inspector, rather than haring off on her own to investigate. The plot moved quickly and in a sensible fashion.

Favorite lines:
♦ Life is too short to let others drag you down.
♦ “Perhaps ye should accompany me tae the loo. Ye could hold me private parts so the aim is more tae yer liking.”
♦ “What Harry saw in the likes o’ her, I donnae have a Scooby.”


And, the infamous ‘holding my breath line’: The breath I hadn’t realized I was holding rushed out.

Interesting and entertaining; four stars

( Trope Test )

Heart of Scone: A Culinary Murder Morsel by Allen Henry

My rating: 2 of 5 stars


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I finished an ebook last night: Heart of Scone by Allen Henry. It’s the first in the “Placid Harbor” series of cozy mysteries. The main character is Harriet, who owns and operates a bakery/cafe on the Oregon coast.

At the town’s annual fundraiser, one of Placid Harbor’s troublemakers is shot and killed. The police immediately arrest the man whose gun was found at the scene, but Harriet is convinced Gus is innocent. Even the victim’s estranged wife doesn’t believe Gus killed Jesse. Curious, Harriet begins asking questions around town, and when she gets contradicting stories in return, she realizes there is more going on than anyone imagined.

The book’s blurb made it sound far more interesting than it was. In reality, it was a confusing jumble.
( Spoilers! )

Favorite lines:
♦ “It’s funny how you can get so used to something that you don’t notice it any more.”

In short, too many characters to keep track of, plot had precious little cohesion, and very little made any sense. Two stars, which is about half a point more than this deserved.

A Bottle Full of Djinn by Paula Lester

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


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On...Wednesday night, I think, I finished reading A Bottle Full of Djinn by Paula Lester. It’s the first book (perhaps the prequel?) to the “Sunnyside Retired Witches Community” of paranormal mysteries. The main character is Zoey Rivers, who’s the overseer of the retirement home.

Zoey loves her job of being in charge of the Sunnyside Retired Witches home. The quirky residents are like family to her, and magical incidents are routine. However, when magical mishaps start escalating, Zoey learns she may have a Djinni on the loose in the home. Her boyfriend offers some advice, but the woman who runs the magical supply shop contradicts what Doug told Zoey. Hope and Zoey were high school rivals and don’t get on any better now that they’re adults. When one of her residents disappears, Zoey must swallow her pride and get Hope on board with helping to solve the dilemma.

This was cute and lively. I enjoyed meeting the residents in the retirement home. I wasn’t sure about Zoey’s boyfriend, Doug. I felt he was not only keeping secrets, but also that he actively sabotaged her. It was encouraging to see how people pulled together, including Zoey and Hope, to rectify their situation.

Favorite lines:
♦ “Good bye, good luck, and have a good time with the nuttiness.”
♦ “Let’s hope we aren’t invaded by scary donkeys today.”
♦ “He has kind of an unnatural love affair with cake. That and the dark arts.”

Fun story, four stars

Acts of Violets by Kate Collins

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


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I had but two short chapters of my work book to read, so I brought it home and finished it this evening. It was Acts of Violets by Kate Collins, and it’s the 5th in the “Flower Shop” series of cozy mysteries, starring florist Abby Knight.

While attending the Pickle Fest parade, Abby gets into a confrontation with Snuggles the clown. When her boyfriend, Marco, has words with him, and Snuggles later turns up dead, Marco becomes the prime suspect in the clown’s death. Marco asks Abby to do some sleuthing on the sly, reasoning that people tend to open up to her. Abby isn’t sure she’s the woman for the job, but she’ll do anything to clear Marco’s name, including having lunch with odious Greg Morgan, interviewing other clowns, and stooping to a little breaking and entering. Abby’s investigation, however, has drawn the attention of the killer, and now she’s the one who’s in danger.

I typically find myself rolling my eyes at how damned dumb Abby can be in this series, but in this book, Marco was the dumb one. Honestly, what was he thinking?! Eh. Abby was a bit more circumspect this time around, not that it spared her winding up in mortal danger at the end of the book. Mystery authors, please rethink this overdone trope. I mean, how many times can your main character narrowly escape death? I know it’s meant to be exciting, but it actually becomes tedious after about the third book. All that aside, characterizations were good, plot was well-paced and proceeded in an orderly fashion. I could have done without Abby’s airhead of a mother and Marco’s overbearing one.

Favorite lines:
♦ “Snuggles the Clown threatened you?”
♦ Ordinarily, I don’t eat ice cream before lunch, but after being shoved and threatened and stained with mustard, I felt a strong need to soak my irritated nerves in butterfat.
♦ “Never trust a clown. They’ll toss you into a burning building without giving it a second thought.”
♦ At the front door we were swarmed by small, whimpering bodies with oozing orifices and sticky fingers, making my ovaries shrink up in fear.
♦ I loved it when men thought they’d come up with an original idea.
♦ A remorseful, bad-tempered, raving stilt walker. Was there any worse kind?
♦ “I think your mother would understand that finding a killer to save your backside is a little more important than her lasagna.” // “You don’t know my mother.”
♦ “Do me a favor. Hold the pillow over my face and end my misery.”
♦ You did it, you clever, multitalented cat woman!
♦ “You hung in there, even when there was nothing left to hang on to.”

Good enough to earn four stars.

Rise Like a Goddess by April Canavan

My rating: 2 of 5 stars


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It was Thursday night (I think!) when I finished reading Rise Like a Goddess, which is the prequel to author April Canavan’s “Surprise Goddess” series of paranormal lite (I guess). The main character is Evangeline Lewis.

After getting fired on her 25th birthday, Eva is at loose ends. That is, until she gets a mysterious delivery consisting of a deed and a key to a house in Surprise, AZ. With few options available, Eva packs up and moves to Surprise. It seems the fates don’t want her there; she gets three flat tires on the way. When Evangeline finally arrives, she goes to the business that sent her the key, where she meets three honest-to-goodness gods. They tell her that she is also a goddess, and that she may be the key to finding out why so many gods and goddesses have been disappearing of late.

I would have enjoyed this more if there was a point to it other than setting up the rest of the series. There was a romantic interest introduced. Characterizations fell flat, but to be fair, this was a short novella. Not much in the way of a plot.

Favorite lines: Her phone was pre-dialed to 911 just in case she was stuck in an episode of Supernatural and he was a demon in a meat suit.

Lackluster, not even deserving of three stars. Two-star rating

A Little Taste of Murder by Carolyn L. Dean

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


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Finished an ebook last night. It was A Little Taste of Murder by Carolyn L Dean, and it’s the first in the “Brightwater Bay” cozy series. The main character is widowed Claire.

Claire wants to visit the San Juan islands over the holidays before she needs to return home to AZ and get a job. There’s nothing for her back home except a too-empty apartment. On her way to catch the ferry, however, her car breaks down and leaves her stranded in Brightwater Bay with her dog, Roscoe. Fortunately, the sheriff gives her a ride into town and introduces Claire to Daisy, who has some cottages to rent. What was meant to be an overnight stay until her car is fixed becomes a longer stay when a man is murdered on the doorstep of Claire’s cottage. Now the detective in charge is telling her to stay in town, and Claire’s funds are running low. New friends step up to help. Molly introduces Claire to her aunt, who just so happens to need some help in the local bakery. Soon Claire is feeling more at home here than she ever did in AZ, and handsome Scott is one more reason she may wish to stick around longer.

I liked the story. Claire was a resilient character. All characters were portrayed well, even the less than savory ones. I appreciated that Claire wasn’t doing any overt investigating. When she recalled something or overheard information, she dutifully passed it along.

Favorite lines:
♦ “Best thing about being an adult is being able to eat dessert first.”
♦ “I took a no-fruitcake vow years ago.”

Charming and seasonal...four stars.